Sunday, August 18, 2013

Ups and Downs

Life is full of ups and downs, isn't it?  I always forget that when I have a couple week long up time, that I am in for a crash.....  There is always some minor thing that triggers it, but it is like my release valve has to be tripped.

My giddy summer is coming to an end.  My happy time of exercise, eating too much, frolicking where I want, traveling here and there and blissful peace is at a halt.  I am staring another school year in the face  and my brain is beginning the transition.  It is not a peaceful or easy change......  it is troubling, it is difficult and you who do not know me, you who are not teachers, you who are not free spirits should not judge.  Don't tell me about my summer "off", do  not insult me with your- Oh it was bound to end.

I have the need to decompress, to eat chocolate and sit and sulk and I will feel better tomorrow

Except for the 10 pounds.....

I really feel like crying

I have not exercised for a few days, for reasons somewhat out of my control, I have not eaten badly, but I have not eaten real well.  I had a great weekend, but I am always under a lot of pressure, external and internal.  People disappoint me, surprise me, and break my heart.  I sometimes feel trapped and I need to hide or run.

So, if you don't like unhappy posts, sorry

I am not thrilled with them either.

where is my joy today?

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